They really know how to treat a cow in India. I don't know how many holidays the Tongue family has enjoyed lounging by the Ganges, watching the calves play in the water, while sipping some of the finest Margaritas outside Mexico and browsing through Sun Tzu's "The Art of War".

The humans in India are terrific. They greet us enthusiastically and treat us with respect and love. I tried to tip a porter at the New Delhi airport once. He refused saying, "Your presence in our country is a sacred thing, and money would mar the honor I feel in being able to welcome you and your family to India."

There's not a lot of food, but after some of those cruise ship vacations we've taken, that can be a relief. India is sunny and warm, and the mass transit system is excellent, with fabulous trains and buses where you can meet fascinating chickens, hogs, and dogs from all over the Indian subcontinent. Humans too.

The Himalayas are out of this world. We had an Ungulate Military Strategy Conference in a quaint Buddhist retreat center up there about 12 years ago, and I'm telling you, that mountain air and glacial water can bring out the best in a bull.

It's expensive flying there, but the people are friendly and the McDonald's don't serve beef. Paradise."